The Tough Stuff
Had Corp Fi exam this morning, a three-hour from 9:15am - 12:30pm.
Walked out early and then realised I actually wanted to go to the toilet. That's what cramming does to you, you react to everything but the subject material (in this case divestitures, acquisitions and other such rubbish) about 2 minutes too late.
So I skipped (well not really, since my bladder was quite full and trust me, it can hold a lot - ask Drew about NYE 2004) because I was happy I've got halfway through my exams. Two down - two to go! It's actually quite nice outside the Royal Exhibition Building and while enjoying the fountain and whatnot, I headed towards the IMAX theatre to look for a toilet.
Anyway, got there, went in and in the middle of doing my business in a urinal, I hear this shuffling and then a very audible "Ohhh".
Now I don't know if it's just me, but I have never made any purposeful audible sounds in a public toilet before. I've always tried to be discreet about it. Obviously this guy didn't know anything about that because he fully proceeded to grunt.
With my full tank bladder, I just wanted to get the hell outta there. But, I reasoned, it couldn't get any worse.
"Ohhhh...far out!" which was VERY audible followed by an even more audible explosion. I'm not going into the details but imagine the worse bowel sound you can fathom...well I heard something ten times as bad.
"F**k! Ohhh s**t," and I started getting very scared. He then got even more aggressive,
"C'mon! Yeah, c'mon!" I was fully freaking at that stage, I almost got my on wee on myself! I had no idea what the hell was going on. By the time I finished, I did a quick rinse (which is totally not of the norm - as most people who know me well would tell you, I do a very thorough wash, and then go through with the toilet paper on the tap and door handles) and quickly opened the door with my bare hands (sans toilet paper!). As I left, the dude was still yelling and groaning. I practically ran outta there!
Anyway, that has got to be the weirdest toilet experience of my life. And I touched the tap and door handles!!!
posted by greggie @ 4:26 pm
2 Comments:
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